To Give My Life
by Kazima Kuwabara
Summary: i rewrote my very first story! this is based on the episode when resho and kuwabara thought! What was everyone thinking as they watched the human die? Hints of KuwabaraXYusuke


Okay I really loved the episode where Kuwabara fights that s.o.b even though his ribs are broken and he's so killing himself! So I thought I'd write a story on it. This is the episode where Yukina shows up and he wins because of her. This is the best. And as always I own nothing.

This story switches from everyone's Pov's. Well enjoy.

1234

**YUSUKE**

DamXit…why the hell is Kuwabara doing this!? Why?! He's so stupid, fighting just to keep honor and fight like a man...

I couldn't help but back down when he looked at me with those pitiful eyes…his sorrow was so obvious when between gritted teeth he told me, " I know these guys are cheating us. Heck I know what happens if we lose!" He looked at me, his eyes where glazed and he swayed from dizziness. "But if you and Hiei go on some tyrant destroying people until you get your way then you'll be just like them! Let's when this thing clean, like-"

"Men..." I said with him. This guy is so predictable.

That's what is kind of great about him, he may act stupid and be a big flake...but the guy has got the biggest heart. DXmm him. He smiled back glad I saw his perspective. I heard Hiei mumble about this being touching or something...Kuwabara smiled at me and rose on shaky feet.

'Don't die...' Was all I could think of I was afraid that he'd fall, meeting the ground as soon as he got in the ring. But he walked up to ring, a stage where we keep betting our lives…he was shaking and he looked so sick. DXmm you Kuwabara...now...now you're in that STUPID ring getting yourself KILLED because YOU are the DUMBEST person that HAS EVER LIVED!!

Why did I let him go out there!? Don't get me wrong I could have easily knocked him out and said no way, but its something about his eyes. His eyes, even when he's smiling they have this sad determined look, as if he knows dark secrets I don't and never will know.

Please Kuwabara, I've never had a best friend before, and I don't want to lose you now that I got you.

** Kurama**

I feel so helpless.

Kuwabara is injured just as much as me, he may not be shedding as much blood, but he's hurt just as severely. God, you are too noble for your own good! He's taking hit after hit, and stands up even when he realizes he can't use his spirit sword! Why Kazuma!?...I wish I could have held out longer, just a bit longer. Then it wouldn't be like this!!

He often confuses me this one. Kuwabara is noble and has an honor code worthy to rival my own. Kuwabara is a great person, a tribute to human beings whether they know it or not! He does have a sad secret though. One very sad secret, but every one has scars on their hearts. I know about this, because why'll I was briefly in hell, I met the demon that killed his parents.

That's right…Kuwabara's parents were murdered by a demon. This demon was vulgar but I listened to the sick tale of what he did to Kuwabara's family, and what he made Shizuru and Kuwabara do. The demon made them watch...watch as they where killed. Why he did this? There was no real reason the family just happened to be in the wrong place at the wrong time. It's just horrible.

It's almost strange that I would know Kuwabara before we even met. Fate I guess. When Hiei and I first saw you Kuwabara, we were most surprised...you were just as he had described. He had there was something passionate in his your eyes, and we could see it. Oh Kuwabara…I'm sorry. I don't know why, but I feel as if I should protect you. Teach you, help you do what ever I can. And with a smile, you just accept it. Treat me as a friend...

I'm surprised Kuwabara is the way he is...

Kuwabara will never tell a soul what was done to him, and neither will his sister. I will never speak his secret...never...and I know Hiei won't either. Until he is ready to share his secret I will remain quiet. I promise you Kuwabara.

So please, make it Kuwabara...I know you're, hurt but you must hold out just a bit longer.

**Genkai**

That fool...he will die. You noble, noble fool. Can't you see your friends need you to remain here? You blind idiot. You are going to die.

** Hiei**

Idiot. I give you 30 seconds before you give up and we're in even more serious trouble.

**Koenma**

Every bone in his body is cracking, and he will surely die...

Its...not right...

If I could, I'd pull him out, but that threat of killing anyone who stopped him was real. He would do it, even if he wound up killing himself in the process. Kazuma Kuwabara...your past was blood filled your present is blood filled...and your future? I looked into it...You don't have long.

Age 27.

It's marked on your papers, in your file. You will die at age 27. I know this, because everyone has a due date, Yusuke doesn't, because he has died and come back. This has never happened before and his life is unstable. But hell, even Hiei has a due date...and his date is very far off. Everyone's is so far away... but Kuwabara yours isn't. You are going to touch the hearts of many, and then out of the blue, in your own classroom...you're just going to collapse...and that's it.

That's the end of a man named Kazuma Kuwabara.

No noble death, like you would deserve. Just a death like any other persons. It's just not fair. KUWABARA YOUR LIFE IS ALREADY SHORT SO DON'T WASTE YOUR LIFE NOW!!

You are a noble man and right now your all we have left. But DXmmit Kuwabara, it's not supposed to happen this way!! "See you Kuwabara you always were my favorite!"

But of course he was...it was because his father...No never mind. Don't think that now. Can't go thinking things like this now...Not now. No just watch...

I can't Imagine what Yusuke is feeling right now, witnessing his best friend being tortured so horribly...just like that...I'M A DEMI-GOD FOR CRYING OUT LOUD YET I CAN'T DO A THING!! I'M SORRY KUWABARA!!

The ogre next to me is upset and wants to know if Kuwabara will be okay giving up his life energy. How will he make it, he asks. How will he be okay? "That's right blue ogre...I'm afraid this time it will be of a more permanent kind..."

Truth is...he won't.

**Kuwabara**

I'm done...I can't go on. I've already tapped into my life energy and I'm wasting it. God, is this how it ends? I'll never see Yukina again and try to convince her that I love her... Who am I kidding...she could never love me. To be honest, I could never love her...she feels just like my Mom did...Mom. Yukina is just as sweet as her. I love someone else, but to tell him, would mean him hating me...and I couldn't deal with going back to the ways things used to be. I love being on the same side as him...I just love him. And I know its wrong, and every time I'm hurt its God way of punishing me for being like this...right? I am what people consider just a disease aren't I?

Oh man...that one hurt...what that aXs fXck call it...meteor crush? Something like that...I can't die...I can't leave Shizuru alone. But I may have no choice. This guy is unbeatable...the only way to take him down...is...by getting rid of my own life. My life energy I wonder if this counts as suicide. At least I'll go down in honor, like a southern man in one of my books, or a cowboy in a blazing glory...or even a Samurai.

It's not like I'm important anyway. Maybe I'm important to my friends, but who else? I'm a looser in everyone's eyes...but I think that's because they don't know me like my friends...

I'm sorry guys...I'm sorry everyone...I can use the last of what I have to say goodbye... I'm sorry guys...Yusuke maybe now I can tell you how I feel. Ha, no way. Nope. Too chicken...Besides why ruin a good friendship over my disgusting crush?

Yusuke Urameshi, even if you don't love me the way I love you, you have always been my best friend. And will always be. Think its what Kurama said was fate. Personally I think fate can kiss my aXs!

**Hiei**

He's really going to kill himself.

Just to make sure we win, he's willing to die and leave all his friends and family behind. That's a heartless stunt _**I**_ would pull, you idiot! Don't you dare be like me daXmit!

_"Hiei you little punk...and you always say mean stuff to me..." _

What, he's in my head...how...?

_"But I know under all that junk your a good guy."_

He...he really is going to die...that fool! DOESN'T HE KNOW PEOPLE HERE NEED HIM! HE HAS A SISTER THAT EXSPECTS HIM TO COME HOME! YOUR WASTEING THE CHANCE I NEVER GOT...YOUR WASTEING THE CHANCE ALL BECAUSE OF YOUR STUPID HONOR CODE! TO HELL WITH IT YOU MORON!

... 

I know. I know another reason why he's doing this...he doing this for me. And Kurama, the masked fighter, and Yusuke...He's doing this because he's noble.

FXck, he's doing this because he's him! Fool, I _DESPISE_ humans! Every one of them...but...you have proven that not...all of your race is so, so disgusting. How the hell did you do it? 

Fo-Kuwabara...I think I will miss are tormenting games...DAXMIT! YOU FOOL YOU ARE GOING TO DIE!!!

**Kurama**

Kuwabara...God I don't want you to die. You're one of the many people in my life I care for...please Kuwabara don't die...Somehow you have to pull through this. You've done it before with the Saint beasts! C'mon and do that again!

_"Kurama you taught me a lot with the things you said. There's no one more caring than you!" _

No...that was him...Damit no! Why Kazuma...why? Don't die...You who are just as loving as my mother. Spending time training you, and here fighting along side you has shown me who you are.

Your not just some human, an insignificant other lost in the millions of faces, your you. Your the kind of person that doesn't even want to fight, but you seem to feel like its your duty! Even when you fight with Hiei I know you never mean it...In fact I can sense happiness from all your bouts.

Kazuma stay don't leave...If I had been stronger...I COULD have spared you. God...I'm sorry. Kazuma...Kuwabara...

Forgive me...

**Genkai**

If he dies everything we've done here will go down the fuXking toilet. Yusuke needs him here for support...who would we get to replace him? No one...Yusuke wouldn't hear of it. Yusuke would blow up right here and now, and bring everyone down to hell with him. I may be an old woman but I'm not dumb...I've seen them together. I know how they feel...both are just too knuckle headed to admit it.

_"Mummy fighter...person."_

Ugh...that Moron!

"You saved those guys from doctor Ichigaki… and that really means a lot to me. You didn't say much, but somehow it really feels like I knew you."

Oh Kuwabara, why throw your life away. I knew when you fought Rando and then released your spirit to get Yusuke to fight harder, that you were something special. You are different, you Stupid boy! Can't you see everyone here needs you? Yusuke...the even bigger dumb aXs especially needs you! You two care a great deal for each other and are a bunch of aXs's, because you ArE to blind to notice the other feels the same!

Kuwabara...I know you can find a way around this...you must live. You are part of a very twisted and bloody plot but this is your destiny. Don't die now.

**Yusuke**

Look at him up there! He's dead where he's standing! I don't care if he dies anymore...GO AHEAD YOU BIG FUXKING LOOSER!! 

_"And...Urameshi...well…uh..."_

WAIT! I DIDN'T MEAN IT!! DON'T DIE...DON'T DIE!! Don't you dare say good bye and die! DON'T LEAVE ME HERE! KUWABARA...I NEED YOU HERE!! DAXMIT! FXCK! SXIT!!. Huh? He's turning around!? WHY THE HELL IS HE SMILING!? STOP THAT FUXKING SMILING AND GET OUT OF THAT DAXM RING!

Kuwabara don't you leave me!! I...I NEED YOU HERE TO BE BY MY SIDE!!

** Kuwabara**

I can't...say goodbye to him like that. Its like when someone makes a phone call and says goodbye. I have to face him. DXmm...Boy he looks surprised...and pissed that I'm smiling...Oh well He's gonna have to face it! I won't be there to save his AXS ALL THE TIME!! HAHAHA...HA...huu...SXit this is depressing. I can't even delude myself that I'm stronger than Urameshi...Oh what the hell. Time for the famous last words...

**"Just take care of the rest of this okay?"**

What else was everyone expecting me too say?

THAT HES MY BEST FRIEND IN THE WHOLE MOTHER FUXKING WORLD?! THAT I'D DIE FOR HIM IF GIVEN THE CHANCE!? THAT I ALWAYS LOOKED UP TO HIM? NO...no...instead I smiled at him...I want to say so much more like, that he's my best friend and that he's the only thing keeping me here, and more...but I won't...I can't. Not just 'cause its mushy but because I don't want him to cry, and I don't want to cry. And I don't want to leave on a bad note. I'm going to die with honor taking my secrets with me.

See you guys in the after life. You know...I don't think I realized how pretty everything is here. I guess you don't appreciate anything until you are about to die. I bet Yusuke appreciates everything a little better.

Good-bye Yusuke Urameshi...my best friend. My Idol. My secret love... okay enough of this sappy crap. Be seeing you, Boeton...ON THE OTHER SIDE!!!!

"YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!! YOU READY TO DIE RESHO!?"

**Yusuke**

That look in his eyes…that sad happy regretful look. I've seen it once before, but it was when we were facing those beasts...and when he was laying on the ground after Rando hurt him so much...He is going to do it. He is going to die…no...NOOOOOOOOOO DAXMIT KUWABARA YOU'RE MY BEST FRIEND!!! DON'T YOU DARE KILL YOURSELF! I...I LOVE YOU, YOU IDIOT!! NNNNNNNNNNNNNNNOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!

**All:**

He's going to do it!

**Kuwabara**

Maybe if I'm lucky...I'll see you all again. Goodbye.

**Yusuke**

NNNNNNNOOOOOOOO DAMX YOU!!

/Later that night/

Kazuma Kuwabara lay on his bed, his wounds weren't completely healed, but just about. He'd passed out after he defeated that jerk and woke bandaged with Yukina helping him. She of course had to re-heal him as soon as his sister came in the room, and strangled him swearing loudly at him.

The masked fighter sat by his bed giving him a soothing drink. His head hurt and he felt like...well shiX. "You have a slight fever...but I'm not too surprised using your life energy like you did. You really should take care of yourself better...you're lucky Yukina can restore the life energy you lost."

"You know you nag like a mom. If you are one you shouldn't be here...take care of your kids. and if your not Go and get out of here anyways! You are a really pretty young lady and even though you don't talk much your actions speak for themselves! Your a real nice woman, don't die fighting here..." Kuwabara began to cough, ceasing his little speech.

Genkai smiled and Her eyes shone through her mask. "You really are a good boy."

She replaced the wet rag on his head covering his sore eyes and left the room. He didn't bother to move the rag, he hurt all over and the coolness felt good on his brow. He was ready for a long, long, nap. The door swung open and hesitantly Kuwabara removed the rag.

Hiei stood their glaring at him. "Listen never go inside my head again or I'll kill you." He then surprised Kuwabara with a smirk, an almost gentle and kind smirk. "It's not your time to die yet so you just keep on living you fool."

"HEY I-"

"Hiei leave the poor guy alone." Kurama's gentle and kind voice broke in. He limped around and Hiei went to him supporting him instantly. "I'm relived...I was afraid you'd die."

"Heh...I was afraid I'd die too..."

Kurama and Hiei looked at him and asked, "Then why?" Kuwabara blinked, "Then why what?"

"Then why were you so willing to sacrifice yourself?"

" 'Cuz you guys would'a done it for me!" Kuwabara explained simply.

Hiei and Kurama looked at him nodding in an understanding way. Respect for the human growing.

Kuwabara smiled, "I can't just die...I have important things here to live for."

"Yukina?" Kurama asked even though Hiei glared hard at him. "Yeah but Yusuke too...he may not know it or accept it but he needs me around."

"Oh, Why is that?" Hiei asked raising an eyebrow. "Because we're just like the sun and the moon...We may not always see eye to eye, but to get through the day and have a peaceful night, we need to know one another is there...At least that's how I feel"

Kuwabara smiled sadly, "For awhile the sun went out and the moon was alone and didn't shine like it should, from the deep sorrow it felt..." Kurama smiled at his friend. "That was beautiful..."

"Who would have guessed he could speak poetry..." Hiei shorted. SLAM! The group turned to see a very pissed Yusuke standing by the door he just slammed, (and cracked) his fists clenched.

"Well we should leave."

"Uh guys...he's gonna kill me."

Hiei looked back smiling evilly. "Oh?"

The two left and Yusuke immediately stormed over to him raising a fist. "YOU GIVE ME 1 GOOD REASON NOT TO KILL YOU!!" Kuwabara backed up against the wall.

"I...I…I..."

"WELL?!"

"Urameshi...I was...afraid...to lose you guys." He choked out. Yusuke's anger seemed to calm a bit, but Yusuke leaned over to him their foreheads practically touching. "I swear if you die on me I'll find a way to bring you back and kill you..."

'Whoa...his energy went out of control...and all he did was say if I died...remember this Kazuma...this could be important info…' Kuwabara thought.

"I'm sorry." Kuwabara apologized.

Yusuke sighed relaxing and sat down. He took his friend's shoulder and squeezed it gently. "Don't die on me jerk..." Kuwabara smiled, squeezing Yusuke's own shoulder.

"I won't if you won't."

End


End file.
